Getting tired, still have a lot to do.Still wandering around in circles in my head, they seem to slowly get bigger as time goes by. Last 5 months has been daunting, last 3 years make me want to curl up in a hole. Shame I have to leave for work, sometimes I seem to feel safe and cozy for short 10 min increments then the harsh realizations set in. I sleep rugged, and barely at all oddly for a person that harbored jealousy of others dreams, as he had none of his own.....dreads the now coming dreams when finally the circles lead to blackness.My stomach has shrank to the point half a pretzel can make me sick, I've tried to eat...guess thats the aftermath of an unhealthy job and the dwindling connection with me and my natural survival mechanisms. I'm not even sure why I am smattering my thoughts here of all places...but maybe its good, as the few I know don't frequent this account.Maybe eventually as the circles bleed onto paper, I'll find some solace in the inevitability of my own weakness. Night all as I curl up to fight another nights demons away.

Jon